June 16, 2011

  I found a journal of my poetry last night, there are a few pieces that I wrote, that I wanna share.

  Here's the first;

  "Sitting there slowly carving the words, "Knives & Pens," into your arm to prove a permanent point.
  No more scarred than your heart, the pain hidden by anger. No tears found.
  You've lost your mind to prove yourself.
  Not wanting them to see, you hide the scar, a reminder to yourself you haven't changed.
  Wanting to look good and innocent, and keeping your wrong to yourself.
   
  As the pain shoots through your body, you feel a sense of accomplishment. Proving that you were strong and nothing could stop you...

  You know you have found insanity, and that pain is your guilty pleasure.
  You're a masochist.
  You've thought of death.

   But that would end the pain too quickly."

  And now the second piece;

  "Play with the dark.
    Scare yourself to feel the thrill.

  Look for death.
   With no hopes of finding any.

  Scream for truth.
   When your life's a lie.

  Silently wishing, you would never die.

  Crying at night, to hide your feeling.
   You seem invincible.
    But you're innocent, and weak.

  No escape from the hell you have intentionally made for yourself.

  Claiming something you're not.
   So you don't have to claim what's forced on you.

  Wishing for the love.
   Everyone else has."


  I was a pretty intense 14 year old... These brought me to tears. I'll post a few more from the journal, but remember, this is all my personal feelings and thought, you don't know what was going on in my life at that time, so please, don't judge me.